Farewell to Patricia Trowbridge

My mother-in-law, Pat, died on the same day my sister Jeanie, on July 5.  Pat was a very accomplished woman:  she raised 6 children and then went on to law school and became a  successful prosecutor in Tacoma.  She suffered from Alzheimer’s for the last 9 1/2 years of her life. Today was Pat’s Memorial Service at Kilworth Chapel on the campus of University of Puget Sound in Tacoma, Washington.  This is the campus where Pat got her law degree.  It was a very beautiful ceremony.   Rick and I are both exhausted and  emotionally spent after all the preparations leading to today’s event.

Here are the words Rev. Eric Wren read at the memorial service:

On July 5 of this year, the Tacoma community lost a leader and role model for women in Washington state who were inspired by her example to complete their education and enter a career after raising a family, not an easy task.

After raising her six children, Pat returned to college and earned a law degree at the University of Puget Sound. She was in private practice for a time and then took a position as a Pierce County deputy prosecutor to fulfill her desire to help children.  Reluctantly, she retired from the office’s Family Support Unit in 2000, having touched many people throughout her life and career.

Pat was a wonderful homemaker who loved gardening and canning and was a fine oil painter and watercolorist. But her biggest gift to her family was demonstrating how to love, sustain and encourage, infusing in them a sense of balance and fairness. I’ve also been told she was moved to dance the flamenco a time or two.

Pat and her husband Bob’s life together was a true love story. Their devotion and affection for one another over the years was an inspiration among all of the family members to make loving each other and friends a high priority.

Today, you will hear some wonderful stories from family members who will describe Pat as a thoughtful mom who always had a positive attitude. Friends of Pat will also share the impact she had on their lives while she was here on Earth.

There were so many beautiful eulogies and speeches.  Rick wrote and read the following poem which I found ever so beautiful.  He wrote this just before Pat was placed in the Tacoma Lutheran Nursing home:

I’m Preparing Your Bed, Dear Mother

Mother’s Day poem,

written in Sayulita, Mexico, by Rick Clark

Vernal Equinox, 2008

I’m preparing your bed, dear Mother,

so you can sleep in comfort

for the rest of your years.

I sprinkle your sheets with rose petals,

the very same I remember you adored,

and place all around you

your beloved African violets,

purple, blue, and lavender,

as always in perfect health,

and I assign an angel to each one

to tend as carefully as you tended them.

All around your bedstead I plant your garden

though never shall you have to weed it.

Out go the young and old Jack LaLanne,

out with the vacuum cleaner and the stove.

Then I line up all your children

and your devoted husband

to dote on you as you sleep

and behind us all, those children

whose lives you fought for in court

crowd forward to thank you

till the end of time.

Then I stop the clock

and light a little candle

and we hold vigil as you dream,

cradling you dearly in our hearts.

You’ve worked hard enough,

been good and true and sweet enough

to make us all feel ashamed,

but instead around your bed we adore you

and thank you for holding high the flame.

Rick spent hundreds of hours putting together a slide show depicting Pat’s life as well as a music collection of Pat’s favorite songs.  Following are some of my favorite photos of Pat.  She was so incredibly beautiful!

I will miss you terribly, Pat.  Thank you for being a wonderful mother-in-law and a great source of inspiration to be the best that I can in life!